I've come to the realization that there is so much time in between my posts because I'm insecure. Because I must pay attention to every detail of every sentence and how I exactly word E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. It's both pathetic and ridiculous all at the same time. So, here's to sharing my heart without the concern of what everyone is going to think of me. Consider it my New Year's resolution.
Tonight, I am inspired by my little sister. Aren't BIG sisters supposed to do the inspiring, teaching, guiding, encouraging?? She started her very own blog. I am so proud of her. Seriously, she rocks. This summer she is going on the Global Journey - 5 countries in 2 months - sharing the gospel of Jesus and doing work in His name. Feel free to support her monetarily :)
Moving on.
Lately....
I have been a Christian since I was 7 years old. By that I mean I "prayed the prayer of salvation" at age 7. The last 6 months or so I've been in a serious funk. My husband, the youth pastor, always tells his students "heaven is not for those who are afraid of hell, heaven is for those who LOVE GOD". Every time he said this I felt this little thing inside of me. I kept thinking, oh my gosh, WHAT IF THAT'S ME. What if I ask for salvation only because I'm afraid of hell? I ignored it. I didn't want to admit it - not me, the pastor's wife, the girl who's been in church her whole life. But deep inside of me, I knew it was true. I knew my idea of salvation was based in fear of hell and not in love of God... hence the funk.
Then, I started reading Radical by David Platt. You. Must. Read. This. Book.
For the first time in my 23 years, I feel like I finally get it.
Salvation is not the desire to go to heaven due to fear of hell. Salvation is realizing there is nothing good in me. Nothing. I am selfish and my flesh only desires the things of this world. God is everything good. He is gracious, he is merciful, he is just. Jesus Christ died on the cross for me and for you because he loves us and because He wants us to share His glory with the world. His name should be praised forever. He should receive all glory and honor. Anything inside of me that is good is because of Him. He commands and requires complete abandonment for the Kingdom. That I might take up my cross daily and follow Him.
To enjoy God's grace and to share His glory with the world - that is the purpose of this life.
Jesus said, "Go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit." [Matthew 28:19]
That's all....
....For now :)
